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Dina Bell-Laroche's avatar

This was beautiful. Sometimes writing from the heart makes us feel vulnerable, exposed, seen. After meeting you briefly yesterday, I want to share that I 'see you' and that this writing feels authentic and a reflection of both your desires and fears. I'm so sorry for your loss. Our fur babies are such an important part of our lives and when they die, people often dismiss our grief. I appreciated that Davis 'had your back'. Keep writing dear Cici.

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Cici Sullivan's avatar

Thank you so much, Dina! It was a pleasure to meet you yesterday, and I am happy to be seen by you.

And thank you for acknowledging my little Rhubarb. She was the sweetest. My other dog, Be, died two months before she did, so it was a particularly difficult time that kicked off a sort of domino effect of disaster in my life. I feel like if I had a place to explore my grief (like the ones you create) maybe things would have been different.

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Dina Bell-Laroche's avatar

We tend to do the rear view mirror thing when we are suffering. Have you seen the movie Sliding Doors? It's hard not to think of woulda, coulda, shoulda ... grace is the only thing that helps me when I'm in this space ... have a wonderful weekend.

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Cici Sullivan's avatar

I should rewatch that movie. Such a great one.

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Jamie Graber's avatar

Another amazing post! You have a special gift 🤍

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Cici Sullivan's avatar

You are my muse 🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍

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belle ☆'s avatar

i loved reading this and i love your sweet dog ❤️

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Cici Sullivan's avatar

Thank you so much!! And yes, Rhubarb was the sweetest. I’ve heard the phrase “pets are your patterns” before, and she was so unhinged until I finally figured her out and gave her what she needed to feel safe. Then she was pure love. So she was also one of my greatest teachers. ❤️❤️❤️

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belle ☆'s avatar

oh my goodness thats the first time i’ve heard that, but it rings so incredibly true. my late dog prince taught me a lot about love and self-acceptance which sounds silly but is true. we’re so lucky to form such unique bonds with our animals❤️

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Cici Sullivan's avatar

Awwwwww Prince 😍 That doesn’t sound silly at all. It sounds like someone who gets it. Have you ever read the book Signs by Laura Lynn Jackson? There’s a whole chapter about pets that have crossed over that is just absolutely stunning. Highly recommend the entire book, even if just for that chapter.

They really are little angels and we are so lucky to care for their souls while they are with us.

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belle ☆'s avatar

i have not, but i will write it down, thank you❤️

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Annexes's avatar

No matter what you call them, 'failed' flings are the best flings! Actual flings are too forgettable and the people you have them with are too. I'm very sorry to hear about your dog(s, I read in the comments).

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Cici Sullivan's avatar

I agree!!! It’s much more interesting and fun when there’s a little substance involved.

And thank you. They were the best. The sweetest. I appreciate you mentioning them ❤️

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Petra Khashoggi's avatar

I really enjoyed reading this. You write so well! Love these lines: “He was a whirlwind of a human, and we didn’t have a single moment to process his invasion of our evening. He invited himself into our party, and infused the night with what I would come to know to as his trademark chaotic enthusiasm.”

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Cici Sullivan's avatar

Thank you so much!!! I actually really struggled with those two sentences - more than any other in the entire piece - so that makes me so happy that you noticed them in particular :)

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Petra Khashoggi's avatar

Time well spent--the outcome was perfect!

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Cici Sullivan's avatar

Thank you so much :)

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